The lie...the Truth

Lately, the fight has been exhausting. I am caught between two places: the truth and the lie.

The lie is that God has forgotten all about me. He can't hear my prayers. I am just a failure that He has given up on.   He doesn't care about what I am doing here. No one does. It simply does not matter.  This is the lie.

The problem is that the lie feels very real right now.  I am in a season where God is being silent. Perhaps, He is just giving me answers I don't like. I don't know. All I can say is that it feels like I am being crushed.  I am tired. I can see the land that we are to redeem, but it just seems so far away.

But, the problem with a lie is that it is not the truth. It is a lie. Lies tear down and destroy. They cast seeds of doubt that grow to choking weeds of despair. Lies cause you to give up.

The truth is that we have an adversary.  He spends his days roaming around seeking whom he will devour. DEVOUR! He wants to chew me up, spit me out and leave me useless. He wants me to give up  and give up on God.

God has not given up on me.  The Word tells me that His love is unfailing.  He can not forsake me. He can not nor will He forget me.   He hears the cry of the destitute and longs to answer their hurt.  My God collects my tears and weeps when I weep. He knows the number of hairs on my head. His staff is gently guiding me and desires to show me His ways.

I am reminded of Job. This is a man above all men here on earth. Yet, due to Satan's prompting his life ends up in calamity and despair.  His friends declare that there must be some great unrepentant sin that caused this.  They tell him to walk away from God.  Job does not "get it"  but he does not curse God and walk away. He feels abandoned and left to die. He feels as if God has left him in darkness. The good in his life is gone and he just needs to somehow accept his plight.  Then God shows up and this is what Job has to say, (thanks Nicole for posting this :) 

Then Job replied to the LORD: "I know that you can do anything, and no one can stop you. You ask, 'Who is this that questions my wisdom with such ignorance?' It is I. And I was talking about things I did not understand, things far too wonderful for me. "You said, 'Listen and I will speak! I have some questions for you, and you must answer them.'"I had heard about you before, but now I have seen you with my own eyes." Job 42 1-4 (NLT)

The Lord has spoken to me so many times. I need to see Him now. I need to see Him at work in my life and the life of the city.  The Lord is teaching me how those around me feel. I am hating this lesson. But, I know what the truth is.  Even my greatest piece of wisdom is infinite stupidity.

The truth is I don't have to get it. The truth is I have get over what I feel.  I can't get hung up on my feelings. Then I really will be rendered useless. The truth is I have to focus on the face of my Savior in the midst of the wind and waves lest I sink. The lie is that I will drown. The truth is that I can walk on water.

Truthfully, I have the full power of God in me in the person of the Holy Spirit.  This power is no small thing. I pray that today He will fully conquer what I feel.